


Love Is Simple

by dedkake



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexuality, F/M, Relationship Negotiation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-12
Updated: 2013-08-12
Packaged: 2017-12-23 07:12:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/923441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dedkake/pseuds/dedkake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mako loves him.  Raleigh doesn't notice it at first, but when he does, it feels like he's known it all along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Is Simple

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this](http://pacificrimkink.livejournal.com/350.html?thread=148574#t148574) kink meme prompt. Thanks to Emmy for the beta.

Mako loves him.

Raleigh doesn’t notice at first. He’s too thrilled with the connection between him and Mako to notice much of anything. It’s like finally removing a cast from an arm or stretching his legs after too long in the car, the tingling ache of sleep being drained by the second. Even the phantom cramps in his shoulder and arm begin to fade. But the way he feels their connection in his body, despite it simply being a mental bridge, isn’t the only thing that shades the truth from him.

With Yancy, it had been a non-issue. They were brothers no matter how connected they were in the Drift. They knew, of course, of the sexual connection forged in the Drift by other pilots, but to them it was an abstraction. Yancy had been perfectly happy finding women when the need arose, even if it became harder and harder to form any kind of attachment to them with each Drift he and Raleigh shared. And Raleigh—Raleigh still spends a great deal of energy on diverting his mind from the fact that he just isn’t interested.

He remembers the first time Yancy had told him about kissing, the two of them sitting up late one night in their shared room. _It’s amazing_ , Yancy had said, eyes bright in the dark. Raleigh had made a face because his experience with kissing, just the familial pecks on the cheek demanded by perfumed aunts and the dusty cheeks of grandmothers, didn’t seem like anything but a chore. Yancy had laughed and told him he’d understand someday.

Except his prediction hadn’t exactly come true. After every date Raleigh went on—really only a handful—Yancy would pester him for details and Raleigh would grumble and push him off like any other little brother might. It was normal, routine, but then the Kaiju had come and everything had changed. There were no more dates, even if Yancy managed some desperate hookups every now and again. And after their first successful Drift, Yancy had stopped pushing Raleigh altogether. He just _understood_.

They were brothers, in the Drift and out of it. Maybe they were bonded more closely than most, but they were still _brothers_. Their fond wrestling that sometimes led to them pressing close on the couch or the quiet way they brushed against each other in the mess hall were nothing to bat an eye at. They loved each other more deeply than they’d ever loved anything or anyone else. The simple fact had been that there was nothing easier or more comforting than each other’s arms.

And now there’s Mako, filling the gap that Yancy’s death has left in the very center of Raleigh’s being. It’s an easy enough change from _brother_ to _sister_ , and Raleigh’s heart soars whenever he finds himself wrapped around her on one of their beds or when they’re lying side by side, panting on the sticky practice mats after sparring.

But the love that Mako feels for him is different than what he and Yancy had shared. It takes a while for Raleigh to realize it, but as soon as he does, he feels that he’s known it all along. It’s just a fact of life, like how Mako always sits to his left or how they flow through conversations half in English and half in Japanese without thinking about it. Mako loves him, and it’s different even than her feelings for the Marshal.

Raleigh knows what he is, had frantically done the research after his first kiss because it had _not_ felt amazing and it had _not_ sparked any other desire in him, despite Yancy’s fascination with the activity. He’s come to terms with it. He’s just fine. But now he feels sick with worry whenever he catches Mako staring at him, because he doesn’t want to let her down.

He wants to be everything that she needs, everything that she desires. He wants to be with her forever, misses her when they’re apart for even a few minutes, thinks about her even when she’s just on the other side of the room. But he’s still not interested in quite the same way. So he tries to ignore it in favor of their friendship and the family that they are now.

It’s easy to do, sprawled out on the couch together, his head resting on her lap as she runs her fingers through his hair the way that Yancy used to. It’s quiet and it’s simple and it’s only _them_. He thinks he could stay here forever, just the two of them and the buzz of the old lamp in the ceiling.

At least, he thinks he could stay there forever until she leans down and kisses him.

Her kiss is soft and warm, just a brief touch of her lips to his, before she’s sitting back and smiling down at him. “I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” she says, her fingers resuming their steady twisting in his hair.

He stares up at her, desperate—but for what, he doesn’t know. “Mako,” he says, licking his lips nervously. “I don’t—” he cuts off because doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say. He’s never talked about this before.

Mako puts a finger to his lips to silence him, her eyes soft. “I know,” she says, and of course she does. “But you love me. And I love you.”

“Yes,” Raleigh says, amazed at how simple she makes it. The _but_ still hangs in the air between them, and Raleigh still doesn’t know how to put it into words.

“Don’t worry,” she says, pressing one of her hands to his chest, just above his heart. “I know how to take care of myself. We’re fine like this— _you’re_ fine just the way you are.”

Raleigh turns his face into her knees, away from her gaze, because he’s blushing now. He’s torn. He likes the thought of that, of what he knows she’s talking about—he knows she pleasures herself regularly, more regularly than his body demands it of him. He even likes the thought of her fantasizing about him while she does it, even if all the it stirs in him is a warm fluttering in his stomach. But more than that, he likes the thought of just being with her.

There’s silence again, as she waits for him. And of course she’s waiting for him. She knows him better than he knows himself.

Slowly, he reaches up to take her hand in his, twining their fingers together. “Are you sure?” he asks, because he’s not.

Mako nods, smoothing the hair back from his forehead and squeezing his hand. Raleigh’s heart races, pounding so hard he can feel it in his toes and hear it in his ears. Maybe it _can_ be this simple. Maybe it always has been.

“I love you,” he says, staring up at her.

She smiles, her eyes sparkling, and doesn’t look away.


End file.
